Let me explain... My husband and I have been married for almost 7 years. For the last two years, my husband has been working on a oil rig. Not exactly sure what that entails, all I know is he operates an excavator and only comes home for one, or sometimes two weeks, a month. The time he's home is great, the kids love playing with daddy, we get to have family dinners, go to the park together and get a lot of chores done.
The other days, it's just me and the kids. I joke about how the house stays cleaner and I get to adjust the thermostat my way. But it's tough. Especially when germs invade the house.
I want to get everything - or at least something - done.
Now I'm tired and guilty.
So how do I get through this?
Here are some things that help:
- Get rest. Sometimes that means a good night sleep, a nap or just lounging on the couch. Tiredness is my number one reason for impatience. I rank this just under feeding the kids and changing them. My kids don't watch much tv and I'd like to keep it that way. But if I need some more sleep to make it the rest of the day, I'll put on a movie.
- Cut corners. Sometimes I need to switch into survival mode. No cloth diapers, no clothesline drying, sandwiches for supper, crumbs on the table, piles of laundry, dirty floors, messy beds or toys scattered everywhere. Some days only the important things get done, and that's ok. As long as everyone is clothed (jammies are ok), fed and happy, everything else can wait.
- Ask for help. I hate asking for help. I especially don't like asking busy people for help. There are certain times I have to. I have found that most people are willing to help, they just don't know what to do.
- Squeeze in some alone time. Read, journal, blog, watch tv, create, shower or hide in a closet, whatever I can do for a few minutes to stay sane. If I go crazy, everyone goes crazy.
- Invest in friendships. God created us for community. Friends are who we need to laugh and cry with. Being busy should never be an excuse to forego time with friends. Since I live far from most of my best friends, I enjoy phone dates with them regularly.
- Remember the good and the bad. Write it down, take pictures, talk about them. Good memories are always fun to recall. Bad memories are important too. When I'm going through a tough season, and struggles are fresh, I try to keep track of things I need or what others could do to help. When the tables turn, I'll know how to help others in a similar struggle.
- Make the most of the time together. The time my husband is home we plan family time, daddy and kids time, and a date night. We try to plan these times soon as my husband gets home since they are most important.
- Keep the communication going. We try to call each other once a day, but sometimes that's not possible. We find writing emails and text messages are the next best way to keep in touch while we are apart.
Special note for Single & Military Moms: I respect what do. I can't imagine what it would be like to raise children without their dad or having him gone for months at a time. Keep up the good work!
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